Tuesday, December 2, 2008

"Did Your Mother Abort You?"

I have asked many people: “Did your Mother abort you?” Before they could answer, I answered for them, saying, “No, she did not. She gave you life.”
What a stupid fucking question. And how convenient that he answers for them. Y'know, I was gonna quote Cara's response to that, and then reply, but instead I'm just gonna link to her article about the SD Abortion Ban Attempt of ought-eight! and you can read her takedown of that awful trope.
And instead of posting this as a long-ass comment on Cara's thread, I decided to post it here and see if I'd get my Very First Troll! So here goes:

I was a wanted baby. Really wanted, first child, mom-standing-on-her-head-after-sex-to-get-pregnant wanted. That makes me really happy, and my mom's never seemed to find her firstborn lacking in redeeming qualities, so I feel I haven't been a letdown in the face of all that anticipation (kinda like having a kid that's the equivalent of socks and underwear for Christmas). And oh by the way, now that I'm here on Earth, I kinda dig it, so that's cool. I'm glad my mom had me, don't get me wrong.

But you know what? Had circumstances been different? Had my mom gotten pregnant at a bad time (couldn't afford, wouldn't have been able to go to school, in a bad relationship, etc.), or before she was ready, or if she just hadn't wanted a kid? Had that been the case, if I could *magically* have told my mother what I, the zygote/fetus/embryo, would've wanted? It would've been for her to have an abortion. I love my mother, and wouldn't have wanted her to give birth to a child she wasn't ready for, couldn't take care of, that might damage her life and that she might resent having to raise. It wouldn't have been to subject her body to nine months of physical and emotional stress only to have to deal with the (probable) emotional wrench of handing me over as soon as I was born to strangers or an indifferent State system. 

For my sake, I wouldn't have wanted to grow up in the overcrowded, oft-hostile fostercare system. I wouldn't have wanted to grow up knowing I was responsible for family hardships or that I was an unwanted burden, or worse, being told that by my parents. And oh yeah, there are some sanctimonious pricks who preach that "We should all Choose Life, because they/she had an Unplanned Pregnancy, but they/she Had The Baby" and they do indeed say just those things to their kid. 
If your mother had aborted you, you'd have no consciousness to know it, and thus it wouldn't bother "you", the embryo, about whom the whole fuss is about. If your mother had you because she was forced/coerced/had no other choice, your life and your mother's are likely to be a whole lot different.

And since I'm not afraid to put the personal in the political, I'll say this. If it were me, making this choice, having an unplanned pregnancy? Well, (aside from the fact that it's highly unlikely at this point and that I'd have to do a lot of explaining to my girlfriend,) I know I don't want children. Not now, pretty much not ever. If I do go crazy enough to decide I want that kind of sacrifice and responsibility, I'll adopt a kid: there're way too many kids who need a home to be just bringin' more into the world, willy-nilly. So IF I were to get pregnant? I'd have an abortion. I've known that from the first time I contemplated third base. I don't presume to tell other women what they must do, and I'm unapologetic about the choice I would make.
The life of a living, breathing, thinking woman should top the rights of a bunch of cells using her for a life support system. Sorry, sounds harsh. But true.